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malcolm’s gone to bed with a good book. it better be good, as it’s the last book malcolm will ever read.

more girl trouble for the friedmeister. this time he’s shacked up with a manbeater. and she’s a whore to boot. this shlump really knows how to pick them.

dean friedman’s got it all - manhattan apartment, loving girlfriend, massive nose. so why’s he always worrying? life can be complicated when you’re a schmendrick.

rock blondsky’s career was at a peak when he agreed to star in a series of commercials for the popular 1980’s breakfast cereal - tramp hoops™.

after the war germans had no one to shoot so they invented a new game. in shooting challenge contestants have to shoot as much fruit off a tree as possible, the winner takes home himmler’s helmet, the loser is shot dead.

clive’s breath stinks. so does his fiance marion’s. not that it matters now. clive’s been thinking and has come to a life changing decision. contains bad breath.

terry nutkins, lorraine kelly and les dennis are the panelists on this week’s show. lloyd travels to nashville, tennessee to gather evidence on the mystery guest. hosted by david frost.

a stranger arrives in the small town of coxwold and after settling into the local b&b reveals his dark secret, he is to become the world’s first ever invisible drum and bass disc-jockey, much to the dismay of the b&b’s landlord, maurice chesterfield kemper.

david dixon is desperate to seal a big business deal but his boss donald cox has no time for the keeno.